little gods for little minds

I think we created a religion where god 
is an abusive spouse and parent.
the idea of tearing you down and teaching you 
that you are nothing without him, 
then building you back up in his image, 
promising you his power in you.
 
blasphemy?  it feels like it.
 
why did we claim to believe the entire bible 
yet throw out "the created in god's image" tenet 
within the first moments?
original blessing ditched for original sin. 
we traded "made in god's image" 
for "born an enemy of god" 
simply because of the garden?  
in the blink of an eye 
we took the basis for the entire relationship 
and traded it for something 
more easily understood.  
 
i'm afraid that for simplicity's sake, we would rather 
earn love than be given it as a gift.  because we can 
grasp that.
is grace really grace if you have to be torn 
down to nothing 
and saved from dangling over the pit of hell 
to receive it?  
sounds like earning to me--or at least a trade.  
 
all you have to hand over is your entire life, self 
and value to receive it. 
why does there have to be a hell to have a heaven?  
because we wouldn't understand good 
without punishment? 
i think we took a god and made it a human 
to fit within our own minds' limitations,
then underestimating our children's minds,
we passed it on and on and on.
ironically, they may have been the 
most likely to believe a free gift 
had we not been an obstacle.
 
i'm both sorry and furious.
 i feel like we've created something 
that would make a true god weep.
and for that, maybe we need forgiveness,
not for our nature and existence.